It’s getting warm out, which means that it’s the time of year in which we women need to invest our time and energy into finding the perfect swimsuit for the season. I’ve noticed that my sister and I go about this slightly differently:
1) Spend at least two months dieting so that there is a chance of fitting in to the suit that she wants.
2) Set aside two weekends to find the perfect suit.
3) Coordinate with a friend to go swimsuit shopping.
4) Put on good shoes that are easily removable- lots of walking will be involved but the shoes will need to be removed for trying on suits.
5) Head to the local mall.
6) Then the other local mall.
7) And don’t forget the department stores.
8 ) Find the perfect swimsuit top. Go to 10 more stores to ensure that it’s perfect. Then buy the top.
9) Go home and have a glass of wine to celebrate the acquisition of the top.
10) Go back to the local mall.
11) And the other local mall.
12) And the department stores.
13) Try on the swim trunks, skirts, and shorts.
14) Then try them on again.
15) Find the bottoms that work, even if they’re not perfect.
16) Diet again.
17) The next weekend, go back to the mall.
18) And the other mall.
19) And the department stores.
20) Try on every swimsuit cover-up available.
21) Purchase the cover-up.
22) Drink a bottle of wine to celebrate.
23) Put on the perfect swimsuit top and bottom then make sure nobody can see it by putting on a cover-up: SUCCESS!
1) Remove clothes.
2) Enjoy the perfect-size, perfectly comfortable swimsuit of my own skin. SUCCESS!